As far back as I can remember, there were Sunday dinners at my grandmother’s house. I come from a big Irish American family where generations blended and overlapped. The scene would be Aunts, Uncles, cousins, second cousins once removed and would often be as many as 25 to 35 people. It was how the family stayed connected and up to date on each other’s lives (remember this was per-social media). Everyone came together from different places and different points in their lives to share a Sunday meal and conversation.
This memory was brought forefront during a weekly Men’s Group discussion around our church. It is a big parish with 3500+ families and 8000+ parishioners. It is an active church with 50+ ministries. However, it is not very interactive. There is a silo feeling where each ministry does its own thing. We are missing out on the benefits of synergy and being able to energize to grow and expand our reach because we aren’t coming together at the same table. Although we are gathering for Sunday mass, we need to gather for Sunday dinner. All sitting at the table sharing updates, news, and ideas.
This analogy of a large, dispersed group coming together to bond and communicate face to face holds true for a company. Different divisions, functions and teams all coming together, if not at one table, but in one room, is vital for a healthy culture and thriving business. Everybody is together at the same place with active and open lines of communication. It is how relationships are built, and ideas are shared.
My best boss created the one room/one table for all his direct reports. We each ran separate teams but ultimately, we contributed to the singular top line revenue number. Through these sessions we heard the same vision, understood the context of our individual objectives, learned of each other’s challenges, and often contributed to their solutions.
It is not enough that leadership gets together, it needs to be as many people as possible. We didn’t just have the adults come to Grandma’s for Sunday dinner; we also had the kids. It is how I got to know my cousins as family. It deepened our relationships, relationships that decades later are still valued and priceless.
The community of these gatherings is a source of strength, resilience, and an integral part of comfort in the face of adversity. A dedicated time to connect, share lessons learned, and strengthen bonds, fostering a sense of belonging and tradition. We also learn who our “people” are when in need of support.
Tragically, authentic communication and real relationships are in decline. We need to come together and have more Sunday dinners as a nation. We rarely eat together today and are growing more divided and isolated. If we want to have a “we’re all in it together” mentality, then we need to sit down with the doors are open; where all voices are heard, all statements are listened to, all opinions are valued. A collective group sharing open and honest ideas, not standing behind social posts in all capital letters or hiding behind news bites. Sitting side by side, especially with people who we disagree.
A dining room table represents the country’s founding principles and shared spaces to engage with one another, share stories, and debate current events. It facilitates face-to-face conversation and affords the opportunity for true fellowship and genuine community. The American table, both literally and metaphorically, has a long history of making room for more people, from extended family to new neighbors and generations.
However, this connection requires a common core belief, mission, or truth. Being a member of the Harmon Family is special. Being a dynamic and synergistic church helps to move His mission. Being an American to keep this country the leading example of democracy should be the connection we value.
I believe our trouble is we confused and replaced Patriotism with Nationalism. Patriotism is love for our country. It’s being thankful for where we come from, respecting the rules, helping people in our community, and wanting the best for our nation. Patriotism brings people together, like Sunday dinners. Patriotism is love in action – helping each other after hurricanes, earthquakes, wildfires and even 9-11.
Nationalism goes further, but too far. It’s not just pride – it’s indignation. Nationalism focuses on the individual’s loyalty and devotion to the nation-state, often surpassing other individual or group interests. There is no Sunday dinner in a nationalistic state. History has shown us nationalism tears people apart. It divides. It can look like rejecting immigrants, being suspicious of outsiders, or thinking only our country matters.
As creatures made in God’s image, we were created for relationships. We were created for Sunday Dinners together. Jesus was aware of this and built His ministry on bringing people together at meals. Consider the Last Supper, the Wedding at Cana, breakfast on the shore of the Sea of Galilee after His resurrection, and several others captured by Scripture. It gave Him a chance to have a conversation, deepen friendships, welcome strangers, include outcasts, and serve the poor.
One of the tangible and compelling attributes of the church is our authentic relationships and loving community. We must be the people who talk face-to-face (see 2 John 12). We need to be in the room and sitting at the table, engaging our friends and neighbors, and being a witness to the reality of Christ’s kingdom.
Without sitting at the Sunday Dinner table developing relationships, human flourishing – be it as a family, company, church, or nation – is impossible. Want to come over for dinner?
