This is a rewrite from my blog of November 2020
As I rewrite this blog to make it current, one of my closest friends from college is undergoing surgery to remove his pancreas due to pancreatic cancer. This cancer claimed the life of my friend and neighbor last summer. Last week I attended the funeral for the 43-year-old daughter of my cousin. I am at the time of my life where these reminders of our mortality descend on me too frequently.
At the same time, I feel like I am barely treading water in a society that is a constant barrage of anger, hate, and pettiness. We have decided to invest our precious time, which may be just days, weeks, or months (we never know) demeaning each other. At what return on that investment? I find myself screaming out, “What the hell are we doing?”
How do we leave the world a better place, if we are hell bent on tearing it down with little regard for others?
We should have causes and passions that call us to action. Seeking to correct injustices, must be in our DNA. However, we need to accomplish these outcomes by working together. “Get on board, get out of the way, or get run over” is not the way for all-inclusive growth, all of us moving forward. We have become a Win-Lose society with scarcity mentality, where one needs to lose for the other to win. We can’t move ahead by destroying the current foundation, any more than we can believe that oppressing a segment (or segments) of society is progress, let alone right and just. We can’t build on broken.
For those willing to destroy in order to rebuild, consider that sustaining the earth, feeding the poor, raising the standard of living for those in the margins all demand a sound economy and an infrastructure to execute. For those longing to return to the “glory days”, consider that this prosperity was not shared by all and had serious flaws which cannot be revisited; not if we are one nation, under God, with justice and liberty for all. Moving forward is near impossible when you start off going backwards.
When Gandhi led India’s succession from Great Britain’s rule, he understood the British industrial and educational developments were still required to alleviate many of India’s problems. Destroying everything “British,” would be detrimental. Striking down and repealing the existing political and social state of affairs, creates a vacuum, which in turn creates an environment where an Adolf Hitler type can rise to power. For decades now we have managed to move forward no matter which party is in power. That should never be the cause of our destruction. Unless of course, we choose for it to be platform which allows it to happen.
If the primary means of engaging with others is through social media, then we are doomed. Context gets lost in tweets or posts. What is the framework of who is sending the tweet and what is the disposition of who is reading the post? That matters, tremendously. Context is remembering that everyone is biased due to their personal history. Some of my blog posts have been challenged by people close to me. In most cases the point of view I wrote from was not the context in which it was read. When this occurs, a discussion on those points is incredibly useful and widens both perspectives.
Covey’s Fifth Habit of Highly Effective People is to “Seek First to Understand then to be Understood.” How is that done on a social media platform that limits us to sound bites, snippets, and typos? Seeking to understand creates context. It frames the exchange of ideas and discussions. Seeking to understand cannot happen without devoting time to listen.
Debate, as opposed to an argument, is a marketplace of ideas. This marketplace operates on the premise that given access to a full range of ideas – not limited by the government, some other authority, or algorithms – rational citizens will accept ideas that are true and reject those that are false. Healthy debates are calm, with the tolerance of other’s views and insights, and where we don’t always have to be right nor always win nor even agree.
But we rarely have healthy debates, instead we turn to partisan cable TV news, Twitter feeds, Facebook and other social media outlets; all echo chambers that only reinforce our pre-existing beliefs. Instead of researching and seeking divergent views, we now rely on algorithms to determine what shows up in online searches and social media feeds, ultimately influencing the ideas we do and do not encounter. In 2 Timothy Chapter 3, we are warned that moral depravity and false teaching are always at work, in the times of Moses and Jesus, as well as today.
I have advocated a calling forth culture as opposed to the more toxic ‘cancel culture.’ To cancel means “to stop giving support or withdrawing support.” How does that move things forward? “Cancel culture” does not lead to changes in opinion, only divides us farther and more frequently. We don’t have to publicly call out every mistake made. We all have flaws.
Calling forth comes from a place of service and an open heart. It starts with intention, the intent to call a person to higher ground and build on their strengths. It is collaborative and motivational. Conflict can be a positive element to team building or problem solving when we come from a positive perspective. It can create trust and vulnerability.
The expression of ‘no pain-no gain’ centers on the principle that pain we feel today will be the strength we have tomorrow. This pain should not destroy, it should not debilitate – it should challenge us and create new, additional muscle fibers. We should all feel the pain of change as we are far from perfect. To those ignoring this call to change pain, they will not grow, and there is pain with staying the same.
To form a more perfect union, we need to establish and promote the justice and welfare for all, preserve the rights and freedom for all, and in a peaceful manner for ourselves and future generations. (sound familiar) In Romans, Chapter 12 the apostle Paul explains how Christians can function in their relation to one another and the state. We are set free to exercise good judgment as we are confronted with the many and varied decisions required during daily life. Those who offer encouragement to the community by exercising their faith, pleases God.
We are mortal and here for a limited period of time, possibly with fewer days than we think. Let’s be here to live and grow, building strengths, creating positive outcomes; to love all; to learn from others and trusted sources while seeking the whole truth; and to leave this place better than we found it. Jesus left every person, every place, every situation better than He found it. So can we!
